Quotes from Groucho Marx

I'm a big fan of Groucho Marx. Here are some of my favorite quotes of his:



I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER.



A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.



Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.



Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.



I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.



I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.



From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.